Imagine this…you set a goal, a long term goal. It was hard, tough work but you reach that goal. Actually, you surpassed that goal which makes you feel even better. You expect a plaque or ribbon or a trophy. You expect high 5’s, applause, congrats from everyone. But…you don’t get any of it. Maybe a few comments here and there saying you did good but not what you expected your accomplished goal to bring.
Honestly, I feel this way about breast feeding. My goal was to last 6 months. I made it 12 months and we are still going. I don’t know why I have such expectations from other people. Probably because it’s a hot topic and very debatable to which is better, breast or formula. I didn’t chose to breast feed because it was the right thing to do as indicated in so many baby books, commercials, ads, etc. I did it cuz I wanted to and after I tried it, it worked. It was very hard work and something that Randy really couldn’t help with. Although he does a great job of tucking us in with blankets and propping us with pillows.
I think the kicker, which led me to blog about this, was at Lily’s 1 yr appointment yesterday. I expected the pediatrician to provide a high 5 and applause but instead he (yes, he’s a he) talked about when to wean. And another kicker, hey it’s my blog I can write badly if I want…a close person jokingly said “so much for breast feeding helping with allergies.”
I want to congratulate everyone with children, whether they are breast fed or formula fed. Many times I thought running downstairs-warming up a bottle-running back upstairs at 2AM would be much harder than having my sleepy husband bring a hungry baby to me…never leaving my warm bed. I am excited and hesitant to stop breastfeeding. I’m excited that I could sleep in while Randy takes over baby duty. I’m excited at the thought of a vacation with my husband only and not having to worry about the baby getting fed. I’m hesitant because I love the time in the early morning and right before she goes to bed. It’s our time. We are cozy with a comfy recliner and our honey bear blanket, snuggled together. She lies in my arms perfectly and that ½ hr is shut off from the rest of the world. Sometimes she will play with my necklace or push my face to the side, smiling as much as she can while still trying to maintain her latch. I don’t know when I will wean her. I do like knowing I made it this far and deep down I know I don’t need anyone else to say good job. It’s not about anyone else, just my baby and I.
2 comments:
I, for one, congratulate you!! If I were there, I'd give you a big hug and a pat on the back and all of that. But then, you already knew that. Breast feeding is hard work at times (and easy as pie at others). And it is very good for Lily. And I cannot believe your pediatrician did not so much as say, "Wow, that's so great!" before asking your plans for weaning, if you have them.
Sorry that you don't feel like you've gotten as much support as you deserve - I'm sure you haven't. That's part of the problem with a personal thing like breastfeeding. You don't make a big deal about it publicly, so the people who support you don't always make a public show of support in return. But you are supported, and nursing for the year is a fantastic acheivement. If you choose to wean now, great. If you choose to wait a little longer, that's great, too. It is between you and Lily you'll do what's best for the two of you.
Happy one year breast feeding anniversary! :)
It's amazing and great that you and Lily made it to the one-year mark. I also think your doctor's kind of a dork. :) It's completely your choice when to wean. It made me sad when we stopped to give up those special moments of snuggling too--you described those feelings really vividly, made me miss those days.
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